The Irish Colleen is in California

Greetings from California, Sylmar to be exact.

It's the first time I've been here since Mom died, and it's been a few months since my grandpa died, so it was time for me to go back and spend some quality time with my grandma.

It's been great so far. I've been to visit Grandpa's grave and paid my respects. I also had a chance to visit my great-grandma's grave (whose temple work is already done), and my great-aunt Rachel's grave. There's so much I can do in respect to their temple work. I can't wait to get started. :)

But, most importantly, I'm still doing the missionary work on my end. I've given a Book of Mormon to my cousin and her parents. I pray that some seeds are planted. That's all that I can do at this point.

Slan go foill...

Something new, something different, and something I think I'm finally ready for...

Last week, I went out to the foyer after church in my singles branch. I thought I'd seen one of my guy buddies that I hadn't had a chance to talk with for a while since it is a HUGE branch and I sometimes don't get to see my buddies every week. So it was out to the foyer with me and I ran into the person. He turned around, and BAM!

It wasn't my guy buddy; but it was someone who's become special to me. His name is Bregg and he attends the singles ward that shares the building with the branch. He admitted to me that he likes attending the branch sometimes because it seems like we have more fun there. We started talking and exchanged contact information and we were talking until Kym came out from her choir practice and we could head back to Taylorsville and I could get back to my ward to help in Relief Society. The next day, I received a text message from him, and I called him back, letting him know that I had friended him on Facebook. He responded by saying, "Yeah, we can be friends. I hope we can be more than friends." That really threw me for a loop. Later that night when we were able to talk more, I admitted that I was interested in seeing where this was going to go. So far, things are going well, and now I'm thinking about what happened with me in the past, why I was skittish around guys and relationships.

The last time I allowed myself to get close to someone and he would put his arm around me, I would flinch and feel so uncomfortable. Of course, back then, I was still living in Muscatine, and probably dealing with some emotional residue from incidents that will remain unwritten. They're in the past, and they need to stay there because I think I've healed enough from them now. Friday night was proof of that.

Friday night, we went out and I was comfortable with him holding my hand, and being affectionate with me. And I think I know why now...

Back when I was younger, I was skittish because I wasn't ready; I wasn't healed enough. And because I'm now away from the places and things that triggered the fear, I feel like I'm finally ready to allow myself to get close to a man. I'm looking forward to seeing where this could go.

Slan go foill...

Cancer sucks!

I hate cancer with a passion. Why can't it leave us alone?!

It's bad enough that it had to take my mother, but now it has to take someone as awesome as Tony Mulherin.

I first met Tony at a singles activity that was being held at his home in West Branch. He attended the Iowa City 1st Ward, which I later attended as well. And from what I can remember, he came from a similar religious background as me; being Catholic and then finding the gospel as I did.

I guess he's had cancer for a while, and then he took a turn for the worse. I'm still waiting for word that he's passed away. Either way, it sucks!

Godspeed, Tony. Say hi to my mother for me.

Slan go foill...

What is our world coming to?

I was at work today when my colleague told me that he got a text message from a friend of his saying that there was a bombing at the Boston Marathon this afternoon at around 3 pm local time. When I got off work later and had called my sister-in-law, she told me about it too.

What is this world coming to when someone decides to bomb an area where there's a marathon? What is this world coming to when some hothead decides to shoot up a school or a movie theatre? I want to know. I just DO NOT UNDERSTAND!!!!

What's really sad is that one of the 2 fatalities was an eight year old child. :( I have a nephew who's just two years older than that and I don't even want to think about how I would feel if anything like that happened to him.

I'm more than just a bit scared, but then I remember the scripture: "Be still and know that I am God." I need to keep this in mind now. My thoughts and prayers are with the families of the victims.

Slan go foill...

Why I don't want to live in Iowa ever again...

There are a ton of reasons why I don't want to live in Iowa again. Sure, I could handle going back to visit, but to live there? No.

Here are some of the reasons:

No mountains! It's so flat there, and after living in Utah for almost two years, I'm used to seeing the mountains outside my window, on my way to places, and elsewhere.

No job prospects. Especially in my hometown of Muscatine, there aren't a whole lot of job prospects.

The "cliquish" attitude of Muscatine and other towns like it in Iowa. I had to put up with it for over 30 years; people looking down on me and mine because of where we lived. We were the poor Mexicans from the south end of Muscatine. I watched my brother get passed over in sports because of it. I suffered through it myself in choir and drama club because of it. Why would I put myself through it again?

No spiritual support. Even though I love them, my family is not very supportive of me spiritually. With Mom gone, I no longer have that buffer of support from her, at least on this side of the veil. And even though I have no family here in Utah, my friends, especially those in the Midvale Union Fort 9th Branch, more than make up for it.

So, I'm going to do everything I can to make sure I can stay here in Utah for a good long time. I've gone from being an Iowan to being a Utahn at heart.

Slan go foill...

Is it too much to ask to have some honesty in a friendship?

I'm angry! Why can't men be honest?

I invited a now ex-guy buddy to General Conference because I had tickets for the Sunday afternoon session, and he tentatively accepted. A few days later, last night actually, he sent me a message on Facebook telling me that he was dating someone new and that girl didn't want him spending time with other single women. Why couldn't he tell me when I initially invited him? Why wasn't he honest with me?

I'm going to ask him tomorrow, and I'm going to tell him how it made me feel. I felt worthless, and I still do!

Slan go foill...

Wow! It's been a while...

Well, it's been a while since I last posted in here. A little under a year probably, and so much has happened.

First of all, up until October, 2012, I was attending the Brookshire Ward in Taylorsville. And then, I found the Midvale Union Fort 9th Branch. This is a midsingles branch that caters to members of the Church who are 31-45 years of age and are still single, or have been married and divorced w/o custody of minor children. I had been doing double duty, attending the Brookshire Ward, and the branch for two months. And I was planning to finish out the year that way, and start fresh with the branch in the new year.

And then something happened that changed my plans drastically...

The branch had been meeting at the Midvale UF Stake Center. However, parking there was a horrid nightmare for 600+ singles, even with carpooling. Just to describe how large this branch is (and branch in my opinion is an oxymoron), we have 3, count them, THREE elders quorums, 6 Relief Societies, and I believe one quorum of high priests (yes, there are single high priests in this branch, and one of them is a couple of years younger than me, give or take; and that's nice having a contemporary who is advanced in the Melchizidek Priesthood; he's got my back!). This branch encompasses Taylorsville, Kearns, Murray, Utah and other 'burbs in SLC, going all the way down into Utah County too. The boundaries start at 5600 S and southward. Crazy, huh?

Yep, it was totally crazy. And because of that, the branch presidency had a major quandary on their hands. They didn't know how to solve the parking problem and had made a matter of prayer for weeks. At first President Norton thought he would have to dissolve the branch and tell everyone to go back to their family wards (which in my opinion would've led to me resigning myself to become a spinster, a fate worse than death I thought at the time). In fact, at the big meeting, he was in tears, saying that in his prayers, he kept saying, "This is not fair. These are my kids." But he got a major wake up call from Heavenly Father, saying that we weren't President Norton's kids; we were Heavenly Father's kids, and that he had a plan for the branch. It was decided that the branch would move to an old Church building by the U of U Institute building that wasn't being used. This facility had a large enough chapel and cultural hall to accommodate all of us (all 700+ of us), and it had a tiered parking garage. And here's the kicker: the meeting times would be moving to 9 am from the 1 pm that we were all used to. It was in that moment that I made my decision. I'd had my paperwork requesting my records to be transferred all filled out and signed by both me and my family ward bishop. It just had to be turned in. I decided to transfer then, so I could continue going to the branch. I turned it in to a member of the branch presidency, and a week (and one hospitalization) later, I was a member of the Midvale Union Fort 9th Branch.

In this, I've been blessed. My Relief Society president moved into my apartment complex soon after and she and I have been carpooling together to church. Recently, with my calling to serve in the temple on Saturdays, she's been giving me rides to my temple shift. It was her idea too. She wanted to attend the temple, and reasoned that the best way for her to motivate herself to do it was to drive me to my temple shift and then do some temple service while I was on shift.

All in all, I've been majorly blessed. I just hope I can continue to be so. I'm just taking it one day at a time and doing all I can.

Slan go foill...